i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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