i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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