i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
