So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
