I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
