He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
