My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
