You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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