My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
