let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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