she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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