Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Never underestimate the power of titties
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
