I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
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