just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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