You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
its liver damage thursday
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
