i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Randomize