I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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