I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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