What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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