your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
