Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
