On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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