I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
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