Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize