All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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