i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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