theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
