and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
