Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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