Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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