He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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