Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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