He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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