thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize