All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Randomize
