it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
