quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
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