wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
