Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
