We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
my poor anus
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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