i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
