how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize