all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
