I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
