i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize