The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
