Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
