Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
