Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
