her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
