Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
The Olympian is in my bed
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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