An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize